Luckily, your coworkers are significantly better at planning ahead than you. Take Annelise Thomsen, who moved into the desk next to yours last month. You know you saw a stick of deodorant in one of her drawers when she was grabbing out office supplies. And a handful of fun-size candy bars.

People don’t notice if a deodorant stick’s been used, right? Or if they have a candy bar missing?

You would ask, but Annelise isn’t in, yet, and you need to deal with this issue immediately. You pull open the top drawer and start rifling through.

Silly putty…novelty paper clips…a birthday card signed by the entire office. You keep rummaging. You’re certain you saw deodorant here before…

You stop short. That’s weird. It’s possible, of course, that Annelise has her own set of Lego Harry Potter figurines that she also keeps at the office, but it does seem like quite a coincidence. Especially since yours disappeared from the top of your computer monitor about a month ago. And since this Snape figure has the same Sharpied-in spot in his hair from where you–or maybe also Annelise?–tried to console him so many times that the paint wore away.

You replace the Snape and keep looking.

Okay, there’s no way Annelise happens to have her own copy of that picture of your mom driving away from you at the gas station as a joke. You look beneath it…is that a picture of you in your cube? You’re not looking at the camera in it.

Oh god, that’s you exiting the front door of your apartment complex. How does Annelise know where you live? Where was she hiding when she took this picture? Do you really look that much heavier than you remember? It must be the strange bird’s-eye vantage point…

It seems like you have a full-fledged office stalker. You should probably be terrified, but you’re secretly a little–okay, seriously–flattered.

If you want to go straight to your boss with what you’ve found, click here.

If you don’t want to rush to any conclusions, after all, there could be loads of cute “how we met” reasons for those things being there, click here.

Love our mini-adventures? They’re just the beginning of the misery. Make sure to pre-order your copy of Choose Your Own Misery: The Office Adventure today!