Your hand shaking slightly—there’s nothing worse than being caught doing what you do every day—you minimize the window as quickly as possible. Maybe he wasn’t even looking at your screen? It’s possible he only just showed up, right? He wouldn’t creep around solely in an effort to catch you out. That would be ridiculous.

“Was that, uh-uh-uh, DateXPress?” your boss asks, leaning onto the edge of your desk to get a closer look at your monitor. You minimize the window that had been behind the dating site, a listicle of “22 Ways to Get Away With Boss-tricide.”

“DateXPress?” you say, trying to feign ignorance. That’s right, play the stupid card again. “I’m not sure what you…”

“I’d know that header anywhere. It was definitely, uh-uh-uh, DateXPress.”

“Listen, I know I shouldn’t be visiting sites like that during office hours, but—”

“That profile looked familiar. Whose was it?”

If you want to show him the profile, click here

If you want to try to unplug the computer with your foot, click here