No, it doesn’t feel like the smartest strategy. It feels like a guaranteed road to no bonuses again this year.

“Actually, no,” you say. Though his fake smile is still plastered in place, your boss’s eyes narrow and go flat. Like a reptile.

“What would you, uh-uh-uh, suggest instead?” He looks around the room indulgently, as though he wants everyone to notice how he’s humoring the small child.

Jesus, you fucking hate him so much you can almost feel it turning into an ulcer.

“I think we should completely change our communications strategy. Best practices have moved beyond this…”

Who would have thought the single work-related article you pulled up last week, mainly as a “safe” screen you could switch to if your boss walked by, would have seeped in? And been relevant?

“…and of course all future points of contact would be tailored to the original response,” you finish.

You are a fucking pro.

“Well that’s interesting, uh-uh-uh,” your boss says. His eyes are still dead. “I’m just not sure it will translate to our client-base’s specific needs. Would you like to create a mockup for me before we decide how to proceed?”

Oh no, the kiss of death! ‘Make a mockup’ always means ‘work for days on something that requires an unfair amount of actual mental effort, incorporate tons of stupid suggestions from your incompetent boss, and then, when you’d actually prefer to icepick your own eye out rather than work in one more revision, have him tell you to redo things the old, shitty way.’

Maybe this time will be different. If you want to make the best mockup this company has ever seen, click here

Things are never, ever different. There’s no way you’re volunteering for that pain again. Click here