Your heart races as you contemplate openly mocking your boss.

No. There’s no way you can go through with it. You’ll have to see if you can get your coworkers to cotton on with one uh-uh-uh tied behind your back.

“Good morning everyone,” you start. He says that, right? “Ummmm, make sure those reports are on my desk in the morning.”


“Remember, Friday is a half day,” you add. “Think about ROI.”

“Are you… Al Gore?” Gina sounds confused.

You shake your head.

“Oh, wait, are you Madeleine Albright?” asks Morgan. “Madeleine Albright liked double-breasted suits, didn’t she?”

“Uhh…maybe? But no, I’m not her.”

“Ohhhhh… I get it! You’re dressed up as him,” Debby from HR says with a weak SNRCK, moving her index finger back and forth between you and your boss.

Your boss frowns.

“You got it!” You smile wanly.

A few people clap and you hurry back to your spot.

“Well, uh-uh-uh, that was interesting,” your boss says. “Moving on…”

Once everyone has shown off their costumes, you all slip your votes into the plastic pumpkin head. Your boss counts them out in front of everyone.

“Oh, and one vote for the, uh-uh-uh, ‘me’ costume,” your boss waggles an eyebrow at you. “Apparently some of us voted for ourselves.”

Your colleagues stifle chuckles.

You didn’t, but the accusation feels like salt in the wound of no-extra-days-off.

You knew you should have gone uh-uh-uh, hard if you wanted to stay home.


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