FMThieving Coworkers

I know I’m not the only one who deals with office assholes stealing their food. Usually, though, it’s limited to the kinds of items you wouldn’t immediately miss–a little bit of the salad dressing you left in the fridge with a massive label on it, or a shmear of the cream cheese you keep on hand.

I like to lessen the pain of starting my work day by eating breakfast at my desk in the morning. My hour commute means that once I’m there, I’m pretty starving. I always keep bagels in the freezer so I can toast one up before I open my inbox.

One day, I come in and check the freezer for my customary bagel and…nothing. They’re all gone. I eat one every day, so I knew one was left, but here I was, starving, and there was nothing in the freezer but a lean cuisine lasagna.

I swear out loud and another coworker in the break room asks what’s going on. I tell him that “some asshole stole my bagels, so now I have literally nothing to eat.” (I may have been hangry.)

He smiles blandly and says “oh, that was me. I left my breakfast at home by accident. I’ll replace it tomorrow, though.”

What the FUCK?!?

The worst part of it? We work literally next door to a cafe. Yes, they serve bagels.

M.P., Insurance Industry